I Have Three Weeks Left to Live

…or so I thought…

The other night I had a dream that I only a few weeks left
to live. It was such a realistic dream that I woke myself up from my crying in
real life. It was one of the most frightening dreams I’ve had for a while. It
made me wonder, what would I do if I really did only have three weeks left to
live? Would I go to Disney World for the second and final time? Would I fly to
California to see one of my best friends that I haven’t seen in a long while? Would
I volunteer at the aquarium I had hoped to work at someday? Would I even go
anywhere in the first place or just stay local and live out my life as usual?

In my dream, I did none of that. I was so confused as to how
I got whatever it was that was taking my life that I was doing everything in my
power to try and find a way out of it. I don’t know if it was an illness or
something like a biological time bomb that was “bestowed” upon me. Whatever it
was, it didn’t matter to me. In fact, the only thing I really wanted to do was continue
and complete everything I was working for, whilst trying to find a way to stop
my death. I was trying to keep up with my classes so I could do my dream job of
helping marine life. I wanted to keep working my job to help pay for my
schooling and my future home. I wanted to find someone to marry and have kids
with (because I am a lame-as-crap hopeless romantic like that). I was even
concerned about this blog and its very few followers and readers.

My lack of time made me realize that there was so much more I
wanted to do with my life. This alarming dream made me want to work harder than
ever to achieve my aspirations and find a way to stop my death. I genuinely
wish I had that drive all the time. I am by no means saying that I don’t work
hard, because I do very much so. But, the dream was a rather important wake up
call to make me realize that I could always work a little bit harder. I am
majoring in a field that is pretty competitive. Though what I am doing is a lot
and I am doing well, I can always study a few extra minutes or I can get my
assignments started a little sooner. That little extra effort could make all the
difference in the world for me.

I guess the point is that you may be work hard, but you may
be able to work even a little harder without pushing your limits. And if do
accidentally push your limits and you are feeling stressed, remember that you
are not on an end-of-life countdown so you can take a break to do yoga or go
for a run…or eat a large bowl of ice cream and watching “a couple” YouTube
videos or whatever it is you do to safely relax. And if along the way you
change your mind as to what you want to do with your life, or even if you
haven’t the slightest idea as to what you want to do, keep on working hard.
Never give up on yourself because there are billions of opportunities just
waiting for you to find them. All you have to do is TRY.

You are in control of your own life. You should never forget

Keep moving forward,

Beca 🙂 xox


1 Comment

  1. r
    June 13, 2021 / 4:41 pm

    thanks for this. inspiration for a decision i’ve been putting off too long.

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